memories & panic

I also saw the inside of Strauss Theater back home, both sides (the fancy and the regular).

And I evaded 2 panic attacks while driving because I'm scared my car is going to just stop working, or cost too much to fix, or something bad. 

And I want to cry and I did a little but it just feels trapped.

~

I did end up crying for a little bit. Not nearly as ugly as I thought it'd be. 

I just feel ill equipped, uncertain, worried, unsure and scared. 

And I feel like a big fat fatty because I haven't worked out in a month, I have no fitness routine, it's fucking too hot to run. 

Fuck, man. 

~

I just got an Instagram notification of Kaylin liking my message and Jennifer emailed me a calendar invite for volunteering.

Those little things help me when I feel like shit. 

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