30PC - turning 29

Welp. 

Candice hasn't responded but she hasn't blocked me either. 

And I think I need a good poop. 

~

Also, there are 2 cats now lol. 

~

And then a third one showed up lol. 

I went and grabbed breakfast and a salad for lunch/dinner. 

And now I'm locking myself in for the day, edible in my body and about to put food on my tummy. 

~

I had my first birthday pie. 

And I just made my birthday post and it made me cry lol. Shit. 

Last week, i found an old screenshot from 2019 of my Art Professor commending my hard work and it's very fitting words for my current situation.


And I finally Googled wabi sabi:

"...wabi-sabi refers to an awareness of the transient nature of earthly things and a corresponding pleasure in the things that bear the mark of this impermanence."

And

"In traditional Japanese aesthetics, wabi-sabi is a world view centered on the acceptance of transience and imperfection."

~

I don't think she's gonna respond and that sucks. 

I would like to build a life with the person, or at least try to. 

And I think I have to actually move on and let go. 

I don't want to. 

~

Maybe she really is done with me. 

~

Candice hasn't opened the message or blocked me. 

...proooooogress?

~

Gonna masturbate. 

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