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Showing posts from August, 2020

i do not want to write today

I honestly would rather cry. I feel attacked, confused, worried, stressed. I'm second guessing myself, my efforts. I feel like I've been working so hard on me and for myself, I was slowly inching towards progress and my best friend put up a hurdle. Maybe it's jealously. I don't know. I feel crazy typing that, thinking that way. It makes me feel like I think I'm better than her. And I don't mean it to be that way. I answered the phone thinking she had some news, or wanted to pep me up, or just catch up. (Not that she has to pep me up. But whenever I've been telling her how tough my week is going, she usually gives me a best friend call to cheer me on.) But today I feel like she clipped my wings. I do not like when people think they know what's best for me, if those people don't really know what they are talking about. I would not go to an AA meeting and tell alcoholics how I think they should get over their addiction. I would not go on the Biggest Los...